August 28, 2010


I wish I could look this cute while type type typing away on my lappy baby.
Assignments are due this Friday.

August 19, 2010

One of those days...

It seems that everytime I look into the mirror today, I see all my flaws. It’s as if someone took a red marker and circled everything that is wrong with me. All I see are pimples on my face, uneven skin tones, uneven eyebrows, feet that are full of blister scars, white hairs, jelly belly, extremely frizzy hair and a very bad posture.

Usually I am not that self criticising, especially when it comes to the way I look; I am quite comfortable with it (surprisingly). But I guess that today is just one of those days, where everything is far from perfect. Today, I am being the typical victim of perfection.

So instead of mulling over it, I turned up the music; danced a little, put on a cute outfit (even though all I did was stay home and study) and took a deep breath. It was just one of those days where remembering to breathe becomes a little bit difficult. It was just one of those days when you remember you are human, and that you are essentially imperfect.


image via

August 18, 2010


Recently, I've been feeling a bit like this:

Come on hold my hand,
I wanna contact the living.
Not sure I understand,
This role I’ve been given.
I sit and talk to God
And he just laughs at my plans,
My head speaks a language, I don’t understand.
I just wanna feel real love,
Feel the home that I live in.
’cause I got too much life,
Running through my veins, going to waste.
Feel, Robbie Williams

I know that I haven't been blogging much lately but I really just couldn't find the words. I feel like I have no time for anything, all I am ever doing is studying. No more social life, no more meeting up with friends; just studying (which I am supposed to be doing right now). I just really need a break, a getaway. I am hoping that my two week semester break will give me exactly what I need, although I see a lot of studying and presentation preparation going on then as well.

In some ways, I feel super detached with everything at the same time. I wonder what is going on in my subconscious. I was driving to uni one day when I heard the above mentioned song. It was the perfect words to go with my life at that very moment. And weirdly enough, I've been hearing it on the radio at random moments when I am feeling vaguely detached. Weird isn't it?

Also sorry that I haven't been around everyone's blog; I have became the Mayor of Nerdsville. I love y'all and miss you to bits. Here's to hoping that I'll be able to come around sooner.

p/s: Hows the fasting going on to those who are observing Ramadhan?

August 2, 2010

Pointless Emo Ranting

First of all let me begin by saying that chivalry is really dead and long gone. Just today there were so many instances which truly showed me that chivalry is indeed dead. I mean seriously, how hard can it be to hold a door open? Really now, how hard is it?

*on to my emo rant*

I feel like my soul is searching for something. I can't exactly describe what it is, but there is this hunger in me which I can't describe. I feel unsatisfied, moody, grumpy and occasionally unhappy. I don't know what is going on in my mind or subconscious, but there is unrest in my soul and I can't figure it out.

At times, it feels as if I am desperate for attention and love. I feel tired all the time! and not to mention, living alone is really making me lonely. Any stray kitten I see I want to adopt. The reason: so that I won't feel so lonely in my apartment. I know, adopting a kitten is a pretty good idea but middle brother is not too keen on it. So yeah, that's that.

Is there generally something wrong with me? Am I just being emo?
I really wish I could figure myself out.
Hope the rest of y'all are having a better Monday compared to me.

I've got some 'xplaining to do. I can't keep a kitten, even though I am living alone, because sometimes I go back to my home town on the weekends and I will need someone to babysit the lil' munchkin. Since the only other people who I allow to enter my house when I'm not around are my brothers that kinda makes it pointless since they don't want to babysit it for me. I know you are probably going to say that I could take it back with me on the weekends but I travel by bus. A whole lot more cons than pros right?

Also I think I am well, physically I mean. I am eating properly, more than I have before. I think it's just loneliness. I guess I tend to get extra lonely every time my mom leaves for home or when I come back from my home town. I suppose you can say that I am a social creature; I need people to talk to.

But, I think I am going to be proactive. I am going to try to make things easier for me. Not thinking all sorts of weird things and try to simplify my life. I hope it works.

Again, sorry for continuing my pointless emo rant.
I love you all to bits!


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