Ed Note: This post was written on 23/7 (almost two months ago!).
Considering I was just talking about taking it one day at a time and looking for small victories, today (23/7) was one of those days that I struggled looking for that small victory. We were greeted by the nurse who was all nice and lovely before she dropped a bomb on us. The PICC Line that was in Zia's right arm was removed because her arm was getting puffy; but when they tried inserting the Line through her feet it wouldn't work. The last resort would be to put the Line in through her scalp. Yeah, you read that right; through her scalp!
Just hearing that I immediately teared up, I just couldn't take that picture that was forming in my mind. It was too much for me. I mean I know she needs the Total Parental Nutrition (TPN) and the Lipids that they are giving her via that PICC Line. RIght now however it's in her tiny feet but if that doesn't take or if it gets puffy, it will have to go in through the scalp. I know it seems like I am only focused to the fact that its her scalp but I can't help it. Z is so small, and for such a small baby she is going through what even a grown up would be afraid off. The nurses are amazing though; they are super attentive and they shower her with loads of compliments. It makes me proud when they say that Z was a rockstar at the PICC Line reinsertion but a little bit of me just wants to cry over the fact that she has to even go through that.
*breathe Mama, breathe*
Okay, so the small victory for today was that Z is now up to 5ml per hourly feed. They might actually increase her feeds faster but we don't know when they might actually do that. So yes, today's victory was her feed increasing and that we also did Kangaroo Care again and it was absolutely lovely!
And she had already pooped before I had her out for Kangaroo Care! ;)